Movies Descent - worst "horror" movie EVER. It sucks.

"The Descent" review.

OK guys if you want to watch an horror flick that will make you jump out of your seat, DO NOT watch this movie. It SUCKS.

OK to start, i don't think it's horror but more like drama. And an awful drama, by the way. This woman had a car accident where her daughter died, and about 30 minutes of the movie we have a VEEEEERYYYY SLOOOOOWWWWW intro to the characters.

So one year later, the woman and some friends go exploring caves for fun, and guess what? Another SLOOOOOOOOOWWWWW 20 minutes happen when they begin to explore the cave, when the entrance (a very narrow tunnel where they got to a deeper cavernous system) collapses. To mess up things even more, turns out they explored the wrong cave. The leader wanted them to explore a new system so it would be a "surprise!" but now they're stuck. They did NOT notify the authorities, and they're on their own.

So it's like 50something minutes already past the beginning, when things JUST START getting a bit fun: The first "monster" appears, and it's only a brief appearance, just to warm things up (50 minutes and things are just warming up! Who directed this crap!? )

When I watched the trailer, I thought it would be more like a lovecraftian / Allan-Poeish kind of horror, but no. Turns out that the enemies are just some friggin' ugly cave-dwelling bat-men and they don't look that horrifying either.

So the rest of the movie is running away and fighting these things and trying to find a way out. Am I supposed to be scared? The frightening moments are PREDICTABLE. And by predicatble i mean "there's no background music, there's no monster in the corner, i predict a new monster will come from behind in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... SCREEECH! AAAHHH!"

Yes. THAT predictable. And in a horror movie, this is a VERY BAD THING.

To completely ruin the mood, one of the girls (oh yeah, there's NOT A SINGLE MAN in the cast) accidentally kills her partner in a fight with the monsters (hello! if i just killed a humanoid being and you sneak me from behind at least you could say "i'm here", DOH! ) and in the end, the only girl who survives gets revenge at the "murderer" by woundind her and let the monsters eat her alive. I mean WTF!!?? You're supposed to be humans, idiots! The key is to make the clan survive, didn't you watch "Ice Age"? Sheesh.

This isn't horror. This is complete nonsense. Oh yeah, when the girl who survives (who is the one who had her daugher killed - surprise!) and escapes the cave, the woman who she let die, appears out of nowhere in the car, and guess what? It was a dream! A frigging dream, she wakes up and she's STILL IN THE CAVE with the monsters around!

That's more or less the ending, no one gets out, but it's not because of the horrifying circumstances. No, it's because these stupid women don't have a freaking clue of how spelunking should be done, they keep making stupid decisions and die in the process. CONGRATULATIONS! You just won a Darwin award!

(For those wondering what a Darwin Award is, it's about evolution doing its work : The dumbest die first)

Conclusion? Don't watch this movie. All you end up with is an awful taste in your mouth.

 

I saw that. Well, kinda. I fell asleep within the first few minutes but woke up just in time to see how corny the "scary" parts were.

 

Might telling us what movie. it is.

 

it sound a little like the movie the cave

by the way it sounds it is bad thanks for the heads up luvweaver

 

I already mentioned the title. "Descent". No, i didn't mean "decent" as in quality, doh

Actually I'm going to rent "The Cave", I bet it's much better than "Descent".