Creative Writing Writing Challenge.

Okay all you M2Aers I have a challenge for you. Write your own Obituaries. I did this way back in like junior high. You don't have to give a lot of detail like your full name or where you live. It is just for fun. Here is mine.

Basher's Obituary

Basher, age young formally of M2A, died peacefully Today surrounded by close family and friends.

Preceded in death by 82 billion people and a negative 1.
Survived by son, Nickleback, of the 39ers; 2 sisters; 1/2 brother; Two parents; Rayvin (best friend); Ark (her favorite mod); and the 10 or so members that she called friends on M2A.

Basher was a lawyer and writer. She enjoyed her job "locking all the scumbags away in the world and throwing away the key." Her writings will be read until the end of time or until the newest fad comes out and the great publishes are forgotten. Basher was so full of life and something else. She will be forever considered as a nice young lady until she starts to rot. She devoted her time to helping others by mocking their stupidity. Basher was so encouraging to those she loved. She will be greatly missed and we know she will be looking up at us waiting for the rest of us to join her. Mass is in Quakenet #mangatoanime at around 10:00 a.m. on the 5th Saturday of this month. In lieu of flowers and prayers. Nickleback would like your money. Please call 1-BYE-BYE-BASHER to give up your money remembered no COD's. He will take Paypal.

 

Novus

Born Sept. 12, 1984. Died Apr. 23, 2004
Time of death: 2:18AM
Cause of death: Rocked to death in the pit during a Rise Against concert

Most saw Novus as an outspoken, mildly abrasive young man with a love for life and all mankind. To his friends he was a true gentleman, and to his enemies a polite yet bitter rival. While it is arguable whether his passion for writing truly was his greatest virtue, it is undoubtable that his love for loud music ended up being his greatest vice.
Last night, at 2:18AM Novus had worked his way a little too deep into the pit during a concert of punk rock band Rise Against. During the bridge on Blood Red White And Blue, he was literally rocked so hard he exploded. To this, the Detroit rock band only had to say "cool".
There will be no funeral for Novus; authorities were unable to collect all of his remains from the ceiling and walls of the auditorium before the custodial staff had swept them into the trash. Friends and family note that he would have wanted it this way anyway, and that getting killed by punk rock was on his top 25 list of cool ways to die.

 

Matthew C. Hage AKA "The Mattykins" AKA Lucy Ferr AKA Sathane Heyeel Ben Shakar AKA Him AKA That Loser

Born Mar. 29, 1984. Died Mar. 29, 2013
Cause of death: Esphyxiation upon his own blood and vomit

Today marks the loss of washed-up author, Matthew C. Hage, who was found dead early this morning in his loft of a downtown abandoned apartment building. The coroner states that on this day, the day of his birthday, that he had been celebrating with himself and after imbibing too much alcohol had fell asleep, on his back. At some point, Hage must have attempted to regurgitate the contents of his stomach although it would't all come up. It is said a mass amount of coughing and heaving ensued until the point of blood had started to rise to join with the vomit within his throat and when he was encapable of spitting it up or swallowing it back down, he then choked to death slowly upon it.

Hage has few known relatives that wish to be spoken to about their lost family member, stating that he hadn't been a part of the family for years, though his brother and sister-in-law did pay their respects to the loss of their family member.

Hage was known during his teenage years for his absurd views and "piss 'n' vinegar' attitude when it came to debating, among other things. He had made several attempts at becoming a poet, an author and even an artists thought most of his attempts had failed. It is believed that he had ties to the Italian mafia when he had requested their services in getting one of his works published, the money of which went mostly to the mafia and alcohol.

He had spent most of his life in a run-down neighborhood of Trenton, New Jersey and later moved out on his own into a loft of an old abandoned apartment building, illegally of course.

Although nothing has been officially said, it was believed that the IRS, the FBI and the CIA, alike, were looking for this individual.

There has been no word yet of any memorial service or burial service. The coroner says if the body is not claimed within 48 hours then Hage shall be cremated and his ashes cast into the Delaware River.

~ ~ ~

That was Hella' fun.

 

Jessica Rose Marcotte, a.k.a Meaikoh, a.k.a "Your God"
Born Jan. 26 in the year of our Lord 19--, died 40th of Nev., Nev.
Cause of death: Stabbedy

In an unfortunate twist of fate this morning, Jessica Rose Marcotte, world-reknowned author of over 50 best-sellers worldwide, died while duelling with a rapscallion. It is hoped that she did not suffer.

The author's family members are very bereaved, and in one statement, her father said that "She was supposed to take care of us in our old age, and shower us with money." She was the beloved friend of many, most notably among them, multi-millionaire Arcueid and voice-actress Megumi Ogata.

Best known for literary works, the deceased's interests ranged from anime to hard rock music. She was also known for her way with words, her kindness to strangers (and friends) and her open mind.

She will be missed.

Funeral services will take place on Wednesday, and the author will lie in state for all eternity, as per the instructions left in her will "just to creep people out." A tombstone will be erected on top of a hill facing the sea so that her friends can angst properly while visiting her gravesite. Memorial services will take place "every time you think of her".

 

Born: December 18th, 1989
Died: September 12th, 2006
Cause: Sucide.

This was indeed unexpected. The world famous "Peachy" or known as Tiffany Henry committed suicide right after a KoRn concert in front of more than a thousand people.

Witnesses report Tiffany came to the concert a bit "stoned". She illegedly started more than a few fights with some of the teens that attended the concert. Witnesses report Tiffany walked out of the stadium, pulled a gun out of her pocket, put it to her head, and sang a quote from a KoRn song she had been listening closely to before she left.

"Hidden violence revealed, darkness that seems real
Look at the pages that cause all this evil" - Shoots and Ladders

Tiffany was a recovering addict. She didn't have the "best" attitude at times, but whenever she was needed (her friends and family report) she was there. She was famous for her writings encouraging children that were abused in their life to move on and look for a better future. Many teens looked up to this pillar of emotional strength. She died at the ripe age of 16, already changing lives.

Funeral Services will be held at the William's Memorial Center in memory of her father that died and was buried three years ago in the same place. The wake will be tommorrow at 6:00 PM - 9:00. The funeral will be held Friday and 3:00 PM - 6:00 PM.

 

"Today, Chester A. Alchemydude died, of a massive dose of sweet, sweet loving administered by three members of the Swedish Bikini Team. I am told that it was excrutiating, lasting many hours. He was a smarta$$ in life, and a lucky bastard in death. May he rest in peace, amen."

*preacher spits on body*

"And he still owes me fifty bucks."

 

Why is a preacher writing your obituary? And why is he writing that he spits on you?

 

Name: Kat Fantastic™
Birthdate: July 25th, 1989
Deathdate: October 1st, 2009
Cause of death: Disembowelment by a lawnmower.

Often described as a charismatic and goodnatured member of society, she was seen as a willing and almost worthy candidate of suicide by her closest friends. Many believe it odd she died as she did, not because of the queer circumstances of her unbecoming end, but because it was not by her own hand.

She was the Daughter of David and Diane, sister of Lek, Zachary and Cassandra and friend to Chris, Angela, Ryan, Andrew, Kurt, Pete, Virgil, Mark, Avaaro, Blake, Cameron, Spencer, Justin, Matt, Kris and many more. Outgoing, vibrant and completely brimming with life, she was such a good soul. Let her rest in peace.

Her passing might have been a scene of carnage but we'll always remember Kat for her wistful smile and helpful attitude that most grew to love.

Her parents had no comments for this piece, nor did many of her friends but one associate had these words.

"The blades ripped her damn head off! Like, it flew right off!!"

The family has also asked details of her death were not shared with the general public. Nothing further is known of the event.

Her funeral will be held by candle light in the Congressional Synagogue in downtown Mystic on the 3rd at 8:00pm. All are encouraged to come and pay their respect, though it is warned that it's open casket.

 

My bad, I wrote a eulogy.