Creative Writing Yeah,I finally wrote something Happy...I think

Well here is a change from my dark poetry...Wonder what I should call it?

Overly happy
And eccentric to boot
I act like a cat
In a laundry shoot

My memory is a little hazy
Oh, and my english teacher thinks I'm crazy
This is my life,sad but true
My brain fragments are all Askew

I've been dropped on my head more than once
Yes,sometimes I do act like a dunce
It's a wonder that I am just insane
Anyone else would have jumped out of a plane

I really want to make my parents take a hike
Any more of this and I'll go on strike
I'm obbsessed with japan
And I have a mom who looks like a man

There was that time I started a riot
Maybe I just need some peace and Quiet
Well at least my life can't get any worse
At leats I can look forward to riding in a hurse

Oh woe is me...
Now I gotta pee


Well this is a change from my other poems...It was a lot harder to do than the other ones too,I guess Thats why I write more evil poems...But to challenge myself I'll try to write more happy ones

 

Bravo. its very good. I don't mind seeing more of these cause this seem to have brighten my day

 

My analysis:
-that wasn't happy
-that wasn't funny
-you need to take an english class
-grow up
-you are not evil.

I put a lot of work making this piece of crap legible, this post better not get deleted.

 

Ah Dr. Nick nicely done.

I like the poem but spelling is a must. One thing I hate it when people use oh and etc to connect lines just to make them go together. It doesn't have to rhymn. But in this poem it kind of fits.

I agree not to happy on the poem.

Metallica rip off maybe just because it was a metallica line doesn't mean it was ripped off on purpose unless that person listens to it all the time and then they should fry.

Maybe the mom does look like a man. Some women are so close. I just want to go up to them and say, "Are you a man or woman? Because you know people really can't tell. There is a reason why there is plastic surgery and I think you are one of the reasons."

And don't get to discouraged Dr. Nick was just trying to help. I think. Heh.

 

Its okay. But I think depressing poems are more of your thing. And I like them better.Good job anyway.

 

Yikes! What grammar you have. May I advise a Spell-Check? Also please revise your work before you post it. I dont think i seemed to get the point of the poem.
And a lot of things were preety pointless anyways.
You can do better...a lot better....>.<


- Kaiyon

 

Yeah well you see, I've never had very good spelling :shy3:

But you are all right, mainly nick...I thought about it and I almost apreciate what he said.I think that I would prefer to have someone come out and say"that sucks" instead of saying "well it was O.K..."Because its true that its a peice of crap.But it's not because I'm trying to make people feel sorry for me or anything, but its simply because It's not my style of writing. (I just wanted to try something new.)But I'll make sure to write my poems down first and check spelling next time so Nick dosen't have to spend all of his time fixing all of my mistakes

I only ask that people don't judge my writing on this poem because it isn't all that good :sweat2:
And...I don't listen to Metallica actually so I didn't mean to rip them off...

 

dude. that's not happy. but a nice poem!

aside from all the mistakes.... lol.

 

I knew you weren't ripping off Metallica.

I threw it in there anyway.

 

Well, I don't care what Dr. Nick says, I thouroughly enjoyed it.
Goodness gracious! God forbid we have anyone posting something without completely correct grammar on the interent. Plus, we all make mistakes, deal with it.
Plus, the following:
She didn't say she was evil.
She is still a kid, let her enjoy her years before she grows up.
How would you know what her mother looks like? I have met her, and to be fair, she is not a very attractive person.
Plus, you must be a very lonely person if all you have to do all day is correct peoples 'grammar issues'.

Don't agree with me? Think I am pushy, out of line, or just an ass? I really could not care less.

 

Dude....everyone is right...that's definetely NOT HAPPY. Gosh...think of bunnies or rainbows or something....lol. ^_^ That was more like "annoyed" then "happy". It's ok that you're not good at spelling b/c sometimes i'm not too. But anywayz...it was an awesome and hilairious poem!!! ^_~