Dead

Today around one... my bird died. When i found out i sat on my bed, staring into space... After awhile it click, and i started to cry.

Later I was talking with my friend over im and she told me how sorry she was, and that i should go get a new bird. I told i might wait a while before i did that...

When I went over to my other friends house, I told her my bird had died and joked about it. She looked at me and asked me if i was happy that my bird had died. Why would you thing that, i asked. Because you seem so happy, she said. I guess its because if i didnt laugh iw ould be crying, i told her. Then i realized that i could really replace Lily.. she was special and she was mine...

When i reread this, I realized that there was something more. Why was Lily so special? Was she really the reason i was so upset? No, it wasnt really about her, in the end. I guess it was more about my mom. You see.. my mom has been sick for the last few months. And no one will tell me anything. So for all I know she could be dying... and i guess these was a wake up call. That one day she is going to be gone and there will be nothing i can do...