Anime SCRIPT: Urusei Yatsura

Urusei Yatsura Beautiful Dreamer

Urusei Yatsura 2: Beautiful Dreamer

Draft 1: Sue Shambaugh
Date Unknown


Draft 2: Jeff Okamoto
06/17/88

This script is a translation of a copyrighted work, and as such,
it is subject to applicable international copyright laws.

*****
Reproduction of this material is permitted
for NON-PROFIT purposes only!
*****


MAIN CHARACTERS

Lum
Ataru's uninvited wife, who came from outer space.
All she wishes is to live happily with Ataru and the others.

Ataru Moroboshi
Unchanged in love: a girl-crazy young man.

Shutaro Mendo
The only son of the Mendo Zaibatsu.
With Sakura, he investigates the heart of the matter.

Sakura
The nurse in the Tomobiki High School Health Clinic.
She has ``spirit'' powers.
The shrine maiden who senses the spirit behind this situation.

Professor Onsen-mark
He is exhausted by the noise of Ataru and the others.

Shinobu
The young girl aiming for Mendo's heart.

Megane
The leader of the Lum Bodyguards.

Kakugari
Member of the Lum Bodyguards.
He looks like Onsen-mark.

Palmer
Member of the Lum Bodyguards.

Chibi
Member of the Lum Bodyguards.

Evil Dream Demon
Living in human dreams, the person who manipulates dreams.

Mysterious Girl
She appears unexpectedly in front of Ataru and the others.
She is really...?


LUM
Yahoo!

LUM
Darling!
Darling!

ATARU'S SIGN
Ice.
Brief Credits -- By Kitty Film

ANNOUNCEMENT
Notification from school festival executive committee.
Representatives from each class and circle --
Urgent: please meet in Lab #3.

MEGAPHONE MAN
Show your spirit!
Pull!
To the limit of your strength, pull!

ANNOUNCEMENT
>From school festival executive committee
to all classes and circle representatives!
Please observe speed limits when using carts in the hallways.
The use of bicycles, motorcycles, etc. is forbidden!

RYU'S FATHER
The school festival purchase department
will open a seaside for midterms.
Today, a big evening service!
Scanty ramen, be off!

STUDENT
Can't you get out of the way, idiot!

ANNOUNCEMENT
>From 9 to 11 o'clock,
the central staircase will be used exclusively for ascent.

STUDENT 1
Don't push!

STUDENT 2
What, what!?

ANNOUNCEMENT
To all students!
It is forbidden to wear costumes until the opening day
of the school festival.

STUDENT WITH CART
Get out of the way -- Gang way!!

ANNOUNCEMENT
>From the executive committee to all students!
Female students please stay no later than 10 p.m.
I repeat, female students...

PALMER
But will any customers really come to a place like this, Megane?

CHIBI
Isn't Ataru's suggestion better, after all --
a teahouse of beautiful girls?
Lum said it was OK!

MEGANE
There's no reason to mock Lum like that!
Although he gathered the start-up money,
that's all he worried about, I think.
Are we going to let Ataru manage, with his personal taste?!

PALMER
Personal taste, eh...

MENDO
By the way, where is that ringleader goofing off?

PALMER
Since Lum went looking for him a little while ago,
he'll probably come back with her.

RYUNOSUKE
Hey, although I hate to, I have to run soon.
Because I have to prepare the seaside teashop, too.

PALMER
It's out of the question, with us being short-handed like this.

CHIBI
Because it's not popular with the people in charge.

ONSEN-MARK
Hey!
Are you still making trouble?!
When in the world will you finish your shop?!

PALMER
Don't be silly, I'm working!

ONSEN-MARK
Huh...

MEGANE
Hey!
There's a mountain of things to be done
concerning tomorrow morning's opening.
That's enough play time...

PALMER
Ah...

KAKUGARI
What's the matter with you guys...?
Say, it's a good idea.
With this face.
However obsequiously you decoy the customers, such a flabby...
Hm?
Yah!

ONSEN-MARK
Decoy customers with that face, eh?
Eh?
Where's Moroboshi!

ONSEN-MARK
Bring out the person in charge!

STUDENTS
Ahh...

MENDO
Professor, will you please not make an unnecessary shock?
Taking off its options, the empty weight of this Leopard is 40 tons.
I'll take responsibility if the floor falls in.

ONSEN-MARK
What the hell!
Hey, Mendo, I don't know if this is an exhibit or what,
but I don't remember giving permission to bring in a tank!

MENDO
And I say, also, that there's nothing you can do
about the thing I've brought in.
Or...
Would you prefer to confiscate it?

MEGANE
Yay!

PALMER
Confiscate it, confiscate it!

ONSEN-MARK
Noisy!!
Phew...
Really, how did you bring it...?

ATARU
Ha, ha, ha...
Wow, great.

ONSEN-MARK
Hm!?
This lewd manner of laughing...

MEGANE
Ataru!!

PALMER
Where...

ATARU
I love you, Ran!

MENDO
In here?!

ATARU
Well, Ryoko, you come here, too!
And -- hur -- ry!

MENDO
Ryoko!
Are you in there?
Ryoko!

ONSEN-MARK
Hey!
Moroboshi, what are you doing in there?!
Come out!

MENDO
Moroboshi, you...!

ATARU
Well now, Oyuki, Kurama, Shinobu...
I know, I know.
So, don't run away.
Oh, Sakura, you mustn't do that...

RYUNOSUKE
That's enough already, you idiot!

STUDENTS
Ah!

ONSEN-MARK
What!

MENDO
Wah, I'm scared of the dark, I'm claustrophobic.

RYUNOSUKE
Hey, let go, fool!

ONSEN-MARK
Wah!
Hey, somebody, save me!

SAKURA
Dunce...

ONSEN-MARK
Oof...
My arms are numb.
My teeth are caving in.

LUM
Professor, what are you doing?

ONSEN-MARK
Lum, help me.

LUM
I'd like to, Professor, but don't you know where my Darling is?

ONSEN-MARK
If you mean Moroboshi, he's in here.

ONSEN-MARK
So, please hurry.

LUM
Eh?
In here?

LUM
Hm?

ONSEN-MARK
Lum, help...

RYUNOSUKE
Stop -- Don't come near me!

ATARU
But, Ryu...

LUM
Darling!
Come out before I count to three!
One!

ONSEN-MARK
Please help me, hurry...

RYUNOSUKE
Let go!

ATARU
Ryu...

MENDO
I'm scared of the dark!

LUM
Two!
Three!

MENDO
I'm scared.

MEGANE
Wah!

LUM
Heaven's retribution!!

ATARU
WAH!!

PRINCIPAL
Well, because the school festival's once a year,
and because I want to respect the students' independent management,
I, the principal, will now put in a few words.
Being difficult...
But, that new Ran also,
as if to say ``The more virtuous people die,
the more bad people there are.''
All people go on a solitary journey --
not turning around, not crying, they walk.
Ah, who knows, 100 feet down in the water...
Anyone human has pain and accidents;
then, Momotaro grew up, crossed Manchuria, and became Genghis Khan.

PRINCIPAL
That great Gyoete proverb,
meaning ``Going through hardships, one reaches great enjoyment,''
at any rate, everyone's uninjured, or at any rate unharmed,
this is a good horse.
Earnestly put safety first in that place!
Well!
(Looks at ceiling)
Hm, mice?

SHINOBU
Ah, really, if you go to the Principal,
it's long-winded accordingly, really.
Ah, Sakura!

SAKURA
What, you haven't gone home yet?
Wasn't it decided that the female students wouldn't stay later than 10?

SHINOBU
Well, it was getting a trifle noisy...
And you, Sakura?

SAKURA
Clapping my hands with the foolish phantoms,
nailing their idiot feet to the floor, and cursing the rest.

SHINOBU
I am no use.
Night after night, the stupid ruckus...
To top it all off, I'll probably stay here night after night.
What a marriageable girl I am, staying here day after day.
Mother doing the can-can on the phone.
Enough, already!

LUM
So?
Every day, it looks like a camp. I enjoy it.

SHINOBU
I'm not like an alien, answer me like a mortal human!
Generally speaking, why shouldn't I go about with him?
Although I'm not on the committee.

LUM
Why?

SHINOBU
That's it, isn't it.
In the end, a certain person worries about a certain other person.
Because I feel uneasy about that certain person,
that's why I stay behind.
Only, that other certain person is unaware
of a certain person's worrying.

SHINOBU
Do you understand what I'm saying?

LUM
Not entirely.

SHINOBU
Probably because I'm tired.
You don't understand the fighting spirit...
It's really trying.

SAKURA
Ha, ha, ha...

SHINOBU
Huh?

SAKURA
No, sorry, sorry.
But, looking at all of you, I'm fed up.

LUM
Say, do you want to go look for them?

SHINOBU
Really, what's good...?
That Ataru...
Without the others, this is what I think.
That rascal is really a man.
For an indifferent, idle, vulgar, woman-chasing,
fickle, egotistical man, he certainly is a virtuous person,
but...

LUM
But Shutaro is not very different!

SHINOBU
At least he has a nice face!
This is a big difference.

SAKURA
The true, modern girl...

SHINOBU
Well, I guess I probably am.
But, Miss Young Lover, because he has that nice face,
it looks like it can't be helped, doesn't it?

SAKURA
Mind your own business!

LUM
I love Darling!
With Darling, and Mother and Father, and Ten, and Shutaro,
and Megane and the others, I want to live happily ever after.
That's my dream.

SHINOBU
What!
In short, isn't it the same as now?!

LUM
Therefore I'm very lucky now -- Bleah!

SHINOBU
Well, if only for that reason, I won't take back what I said.

SAKURA
I've repeatedly taken care of the fire's settlement.
Well, at most, it's a persistent matter.
There's one day left.
Because tomorrow morning is the opening day of the school festival.

DRIVER
Oh, sorry, sorry to keep you waiting.

MENDO
Good -- Go!

ATARU
Ow, ow, ow...
hm...

ATARU
What, Mendo, still mad?

MENDO
It's reasonable!
That electric attack scrambled all the tank's electronics.
The booth is a mess.
It's all your fault.

ATARU
So I made a mistake...
You're also troublesome, aren't you.
But it was a nice dream...
Hee, hee, hee...

MENDO
Don't drag people into your stupid dreams!

ATARU
Sorry!

ATARU
But, what.
To stop at this place, to leave school like this,
isn't it about time to go out and get some dinner?

MENDO
So what?

ATARU
Are the city streets always this quiet?

ATARU
Is the newest chandon house open all night?

MENDO
Do *I* know?!

ANNOUNCEMENT
News from the executive committee.
All classes and circle representatives,
please meet at once in the music room.
I repeat...

PALMER
Ah, but I'm tired...

ATARU
Another day of heavy labor, eh?

CHIBI
How long have we been here?

MEGANE
It's been so long that I've forgotten.

LUM
It's the final stretch.
Everyone work hard!

ATARU
You're really tough, aren't you...

ATARU
Hey!

MEGANE
Not Professor Onsen-mark...?

PALMER
Still alive?
He's tough, too...

KAKUGARI
But look at his face...

CHIBI
Completely worn out...

MEGANE
You'd be too.
A hard schedule, a noisy uproar day after day,
he's completely exhausted.

CHIBI
And he's also got that 40-ton tank creaking above the
Principal's head...

PALMER
He's running on adrenaline alone.

SAKURA
Overwork, lack of sleep, malnutrition,
nerves out of sorts, and a bad face!
In short, you're completely exhausted.
You're running on adrenaline alone.
So, first of all, lay off work.
After a long interval, go home and take a long nap until evening.
When your nerves act up, or if you can't sleep...
take this.
A tranquilizer...

PRINCIPAL
Thank you, Miss Sakura.
(To Onsen-mark...)
Enjoy yourself, Professor.
Only one more day.
Tomorrow morning is the opening day of the school festival.

PALMER
Isn't it noon yet?

CHIBI
I'm so hungry.

MEGANE
Fool, that clock's been off for a long time.
Didn't you notice, looking at it every day?
Be patient until the 10 o'clock break!

SHINOBU
What are you talking about?
Didn't all of you go out to eat lunch at the seaside teashop
a little while ago?

PALMER
Did we...?

MENDO
At any rate, where's Moroboshi?
Moroboshi?

MEGAPHONE MAN
Pull!
Pull with all your might!

ANNOUNCEMENT
Communication from the executive committee.
Will the student who took the electric footwarmer
from the Principal's office, please surrender it at once.

BLACKBOARD
Boycott accomplished!

SAKURA
You just ate too much, stupid!
This is a super-powerful laxative!
Go and take half a tablet!
Next!

GLUTTON
Tranquilizer?

SAKURA
What?
That ought to be...
tranquilizers.
If so, then a little while ago I handed over...
Damn!

SAKURA
I hope I'm in time...

SAKURA
It's me, Sakura!
I don't want to come in, but I will come in.
The fact of the matter is,
the medicine I gave you a little while ago...?
Aaah!

SAKURA
Gack...!

TV
Madam!
Don't go, Naoyuki!

SAKURA
*Grunt!!*

SAKURA
Damn.
(Runs to catch Onsen-mark)

SAKURA
Wah!

SAKURA
But, it's a strange story, isn't it...
It looks as though you vacated the room for many days,
and returned after a long time,
with the mold and decay inside similar to ruins.
Like a small Urashima Taro, isn't it.
With Tomobiki High School as the Dragon Palace, the passage of time,
noisily, in a dream...
You, then, saved the tortoise?

ONSEN-MARK
The truth is...
Recently, I've been mysteriously worried;
but look, I think I ought to be.
It's as if I've walked in the streets sometime,
and have seen some spectacle, and now, I walk there sometime,
and I fancy that it repeats itself just as it was...

SAKURA
That's called deja vu...
When they are tired, people's brains produce false personal experiences.

ONSEN-MARK
I thought so, too.
And I am tired...
But I am obsessed by strange thoughts like that...
When I looked at that room today...

SAKURA
What's the story?

ONSEN-MARK
The Principal said that a little while ago:
``Today is the last day''
And ``Tomorrow is the opening day of the school festival''...
He used those same words, before...

SAKURA
You're tired.
And because you're tired, a wish like that creates a false memory.
It's natural, because you bear with those evil kids, day after day.
Well, that too ends with today.
Tomorrow morning is the school festival!

ONSEN-MARK
I thought so at first when I noticed it,
but I myself am not clear.
Both yesterday's affairs and what happened the days before that...
No, I forget myself, and what happened a few hours ago...
When, where, with whom, what did I do?
On the whole, how many days have I stayed at the school?
Three days?
Four?

SAKURA
Well, it's because they were being noisy.

ONSEN-MARK
What I end up forgetting -- Is it from before?

SAKURA
What in the world are you thinking?
Try to say it clearly!

ONSEN-MARK
To the bitter end, I'll set up this hypothesis --
Of course, if it is a wild fancy produced by my weak mind,
nothing can be better than that.
I am thinking like this...
Both yesterday and the day before yesterday --
No, since before then --
we have been repeating, with the same noise, the same day:
the day before the school festival... And now, today, too...

SAKURA
That's crazy!
You're tired.
Being tired, your senses are just addled.
With one more day of rest today, it will be tomorrow morning...

ONSEN-MARK
When tomorrow morning comes, how will it be?
Do you mean that when tomorrow morning comes,
it will really be different from today?
I don't remember yesterday being different from today...

SAKURA
Suppose, for a moment, that it is as you say.
Then why aren't the neighbors making a fuss?
The parents are quiet,
considering that the students haven't returned
from school for that long, I'm afraid.

ONSEN-MARK
But what if it's not just Tomobiki High School
that's repeating the same day?
What if the whole town of Tomobiki --
no, the whole world --
is repeating the same day?

SAKURA
To doubt the world, too -- Cut it out!
What you say, it's being perfectly eccentric.
It's a wild fancy.
That is your fantasy!

ONSEN-MARK
Miss Sakura...
Since a little while ago, I have been desperately trying to remember,
but somehow I can't remember.
What day or month is today?
Can you tell me?
With nothing but the clothes on my back since yesterday,
if I wear this kind of thing, it might be winter.
But this sweat is summer sweat, isn't it.

ONSEN-MARK
Or else, what is this cheerful nature, do you suppose...?
Moreover, since a little while ago, I can hear this...
But this, too, is an auditory hallucination, probably...?

ONSEN-MARK
Urashima Taro spent days in a dream at the Dragon Palace;
then when he tried to return to his dear old home,
many hundreds of years had passed there.
But if Taro were not the only one who helped a tortoise,
if it had been all of the villagers...
If all of the villagers had gone to the Dragon Palace,
what do you suppose would have happened?
Miss Sakura, you are a psychic.
If this disaster had happened to somebody, somewhere in this city,
you probably noticed first of all.
However, if the accident happened to the whole city,
to the whole world, including you, Sakura.

SAKURA
Won't you stop, already?!
It's just your fantasy.
It's no more than a conjecture.
Where's your proof!?

ONSEN-MARK
If we forget talking like this, tomorrow morning...

SAKURA
Cut it out!

ONSEN-MARK
Wah!
Somebody, help me!

ONSEN-MARK
Explain!
What's going on!
Noisy.
I told you to go home, so go home.
I don't want to see anybody spending the night here!

ATARU
You're undermining the school festival's big theme --
``independent management by students!''

MEGANE
Hey, Onsen-mark, we're getting ready.
If dawn breaks, we'll present our case to the executive committee.
Because of you pursuing your responsibility.

PALMER
To go home with it in this kind of shape...?
Going home to wait, you!

MENDO
Lum, Shinobu, in my car...?

LUM
I'll go home alone with Darling.
See you later.
Bye-bye!

ATARU
Lum, hey...

BODYGUARDS
Bye-bye!

MEGANE
Because they were together in a place like this,
it's an excess of feeling.

ONSEN-MARK
The other students have all gone home.
Except for Oyako Fujinami in the purchases department,
we're the only two.

SAKURA
Yes...
I'm going to look for my Uncle.
Don't make such a disagreeable face.
A priest like him will be useful at a time like this.

ONSEN-MARK
Sakura...
The truth is, I have a bad premonition...
Be careful.

SAKURA
You too. I'll call you later.

VOICE
Lower Tomobiki...
Lower Tomobiki...

PALMER
I'm beat, I'm beat.
It's been a long time since I've ridden on an electric train.

MEGANE
Well, the world situation...

PALMER
What, what!
``Howling wild animal villain Jet Shin
declares angry revenge on Antonio Inokin.''

MENDO
For a long time, Shinobu, I had forgotten this tranquillity...
What in the world is it!
Oh!

SHINOBU
But there certainly should have been a bridge here...

MENDO
It's because of the dark streets, we probably took a wrong turn.
(To driver)
Turn around!

SAKURA
Uncle, it's me, Sakura!
Uncle!

SAKURA
That fallen priest...
Just like him to forget himself and go out at a time like this...
Hm?

MEGANE
Oh...

PALMER
This is pretty curvaceous...
Heh, heh, heh...

MEGANE
Really!
What a driver!
HM?

PALMER
A circular route...?

MENDO
What in the world's going on?
This is the fifth time, already.

SHINOBU
Tonight is exceedingly strange, isn't it...

MENDO
Left!

MENDO
This is just becoming so complicated,
a gyromap would come in handy...

SHINOBU
Ah, a left turn here, I'm sure...

MENDO
It's a cul-de-sac.
Go back!

MENDO
It's OK, because I'll see you home properly.
Ha, ha, ha...
It's a maze, I'm afraid...

SAKURA
Driver, although I must have told you to hurry,
don't you understand yet?

DRIVER
Yes, yes.

SAKURA
It must be 2 minutes, 3 minutes at most,
from the main street to Tomobiki High School by car --
isn't it taking an awfully long time?

DRIVER
Lady, everybody says the same thing.
Time lengthens when you ride in a taxi, doesn't it...

DRIVER
Lady, do you know the story about riding
to the Dragon Palace on a turtle's back?

SAKURA
Now I'm appreciating how he felt.

DRIVER
What if not only Taro rode on the turtle's back,
but all the villagers did?
If all of them went to the Dragon Palace,
and if they eventually returned to the village,
and yet hundreds of years had passed,
that fact becomes a problem, you see.
Not one of the villagers would notice...

SAKURA
What story are you telling me!

DRIVER
To think of the boundary between time and space,
it becomes a puzzling matter, don't you think?
Too much for one thing, not enough for the other, it is said.
If you think about it, at any rate,
time is a product of human consciousness.
What meanings do clocks and calendars have
for even one person in the world!
Why should time flow in a well-behaved manner from the beginning,
from bygone days to the future, eh, Lady?

SAKURA
Interesting.
Maybe this really was riding on the tortoise's back.

DRIVER
As it stands, will you go to the Dragon Palace?
You can go cheaply.

SAKURA
I'm afraid you're not just a tortoise...
Show your true form!

DRIVER
Idiot!!
(To Sakura)
Lady, are you OK?

SAKURA
He got away...?

PALMER
What is it?
We're doubling back to the school after all?
Can't we go somewhere else?

MEGANE
It can't be helped.

CHIBI
Heh, heh, heh -
We've returned to where we started, in front of the front gate.

KAKUGARI
Um, if you also...
that...

PALMER
Going through the dark,
the place where we got off the electric train
was the starting station...
somehow.

BODYGUARDS
Ha, ha, ha, ha...

MEGANE
Shut up!
This isn't a laughing matter!

SAKURA
Who is it, over there!

MENDO
What's this?
We've returned to where we started?

SHINOBU
Hey, what are all of you doing?

MEGANE
We can't get out of the city,
and we're not supposed to return to the school...
I'm afraid there's only one place to go.
(At Ataru's house)
And so for that reason, good evening!

ATARU
All of you...!!

SAKURA
It's no use...

SAKURA
My house doesn't answer, either.

SHINOBU
What do you suppose is the matter?
There are 200 routes at any rate to your house and mine.
Mendo's house, too...
At any rate, it looks like we're the only ones in the world...

SAKURA
It's me, I'm coming in!
It looks as if we can't talk directly.
As if it's only you.
The truth is...

MENDO
Onsen-mark?

SHINOBU
Wow, it's cute!
Where'd you get the baby pig?

LUM
It's Ten's pet.

SHINOBU
Um, Ten, it's nice.
Where did you get it?

TEN
A strange old man gave it to me the other day.

LUM
Ten, is that true?!
You're not supposed to take things from strangers...
But because it's cute, it's OK...

TEN
Whee -- I can keep him!

SHINOBU
But this baby changes feelings, somehow, doesn't he...
Huh?

MEGANE
Auntie, no seconds yet?

KAKUGARI
Hey, the rice...

ATARU
Two apiece to a person, I suppose...

CHIBI
Hey, that soy sauce...

KAKUGARI
Don't drip!

ATARU
Hey, give me the soup, the soup!

MEGANE
But miso soup is dreary, isn't it --
rice flour and fermented soybeans...

ATARU
Absolutely -- Don't omit it.

MENDO
Don't put your chopsticks in someone else's miso soup!

SHINOBU
Ah, really gloomy!

KAKUGARI
Hey, some rice...

MEGANE
Hey, you can't eat as long as you like.
Quick, let's go to school and get to work,
we'll miss the opening day of the school festival.

CHIBI
With the tank caving in.

PALMER
Well, it's a problem, isn't it, that thing.
That is, making that shop with great pains,
but if 4 or 5 customers come in, the floor'll cave in.

LUM
Darling has already hidden in there -- Can't we remove it somehow?

PALMER
Somehow.

MENDO
What does ``somehow'' mean.
Are you just worried that I brought it in?

CHIBI
Today, it's just one more day, isn't it.

KAKUGARI
On one pretext or another, it's midday already.

PALMER
That's true, and we're still not in the classroom.

TEN
You are not in the least afraid, are you?

LUM
Darling.
Darling.

MENDO
What's the matter?

LUM
Darling's disappeared.

SHINOBU
Surely he's gone ahead to the school.
It's rare that you leave him at large.

MENDO
Anyhow, as always, the clouds will probably roll in.

MEGANE
Yes, excuse us, excuse us.

MENDO
AH!
My tank, my Leopard!

MEGANE
No wonder...
It's this heat, isn't it...

MENDO
Shut up!
Are you giving my tank a bath?!

MENDO
Hm?

ATARU
*Gasp!*
Hm, what's this here?
Oh, Mendo, what are you doing in a place like this?

MENDO
Indeed, so it's you...
So, it was you?!
By that, do you mean to make a fool of me, Shutaro Mendo?!
I can't stand it any longer!

ATARU
Hey, Mendo, what are you talking about...?

MENDO
Have at you!

ATARU
Why are you being like this?

MENDO
Wait!!

ATARU
You're mistaken!!

MENDO
Wait!

LUM
Darling, I've found you!
Where have you been until now?

ATARU
Wah -- Lum!

LUM
Darling!
Come out before I count to three!
One!
Two!!
Three!!

SAKURA
The second time a tragedy, the third time a comedy, so to say...
Why does it explain his whole life...?

MENDO
That is the reason.
To tell the truth, when I listened to what Sakura said,
I just didn't believe it, either.
However, speaking of the tank incident today,
and the matter of last night, if one thinks about it,
there have been too many strange things going on lately.
There is no doubt that the thing has already arrived here.
Consequently, we must ascertain the truth of the matter
with our own hands.
Can't you listen a little to what a person says?

PALMER
We're listening politely, but what does it mean?
Right now, breaking the tension...?

MEGANE
I don't think that time and space becoming mixed up is the problem.
Let's conclude that.

BODYGUARDS
No objection!

MEGANE
But, according to that, what in fact is the true harm to us?
We should not fail to ask this...
Onsen-mark's disappeared.
Cherry's disappeared.
To the cause of that...

BODYGUARDS
Banzai!!

MEGANE
That's the reason.
The meddlesome priest, the #1 and #2 enemies of the students have disappeared.
By the way, we aren't going to get all worked up.

MENDO
It's out of the question.
Well, I consulted all of you to try and think about it.
I was thoughtless.
Miss Sakura?

SAKURA
Well, well, now the mixed yaki-soba will come at once.

MENDO
When I will take one step forward...

ATARU
Hey, Mendo, take this...

MENDO
What's ``this?''

ATARU
What do you mean?
It's the bill.

MENDO
I will certainly pay for Sakura, Lum, and Shinobu!
But why should I pay for your half?!
All of the developments up until now
have originated in this Tomobiki High School.
Whose plot, beyond human knowledge...?
At any rate, if we investigate it in the middle of the night
while it's uninhabited, we ought to discover something.
March!
Preparing for the worst, Sakura and Shinobu will keep watch here!
The rest of you, follow me...

PALMER
Did you see?
That sword.
Although it snapped this afternoon, it's sprouting again.

ATARU
Just like a lizard's tail, isn't it?

MEGANE
The lighthouse is dark again.
In his own way, he completely didn't notice, and is conceited.

MENDO
Kakugari and Chibi, check out the first floor!
Megane and Palmer, the second floor!!
Moroboshi, the third floor!
Lum and I, to the clock tower!

ATARU
OK!

ATARU
Yah, ha, ha...
I'm afraid I'm a brat.
Shall I play explorer, or what?
The place where I enjoyed myself with Ryu from the Purchase department...
Ow!

MENDO
I'm scared!
I'm scared of the dark!!
I'm scared.

ATARU
Hm?
Why Mendo..

PALMER
But Mendo's stingy, isn't he...
On top of knowing we were penniless, luring us,
using us in trade for not making a scene about the payment...
HM!
Besides, saying we're investigating - What are we looking for?
I just don't understand it.
We've gone without a plan, victory or defeat?
Hey, Megane, aren't you listening?!

MEGANE
I'm listening.

LUM
Shutaro!
Shutaro!
Where did he go?
Shutaro!
Where did he go?

LUM
Darling!
Darling!

CHIBI
Kakugari, let's use the lights in the hallways.

KAKUGARI
A thing like that, in this darkness...
Hm?

CHIBI
Found it!

KAKUGARI
Let me see, which one?

CHIBI
Well, we'll try one by one.

ATARU
It's, it's full of me's.
I...
Wah!!

LUM
Darling!

MENDO
Wah--- I'm afraid of the dark!
I'm afraid of the dark!
I'm afraid.
(Lights go on)

LUM
Darling!

MENDO
Hah!
Lum!

CHIBI
Not YET?

KAKUGARI
You're impatient.

LUM
Darling!

KAKUGARI
Hm?!

ATARU
Wah!

MENDO
Lum!

SAKURA
At any rate, I guess it's started.

SHINOBU
Do you think Mendo and the others are OK?

SAKURA
It's not fatal -- Being cowards, they'll probably come running out.
Look carefully at the schoolhouse!

SHINOBU
AH!

SAKURA
A 60-year-old, wooden mortar, 3-storied, clock tower schoolhouse --
Since when has it had 4 floors?

SAKURA
What kind of ruckus are that bunch raising in there?
One can just imagine.

SHINOBU
So, you knew from the beginning...

SAKURA
Tomobiki High School is in the middle of the chain of events this time.
But nothing ought to come out of investigating the building itself.
In short, it's causing the matter.
Like last night.
Without fail, something is having an effect.
In addition to making sure of that,
there is no other way to approach the heart of the matter!
Go!
It's your turn.

ATARU
Wah!

LUM
Darling, where'd you go?!

LUM
Darling!

KAKUGARI
Pull out, pull out!

RYUNOSUKE
Huh?
Hey, what's the matter?
What are those rascals doing in the middle of the night like this?
But, just like every night, you watching a program, I'm fed up.

TV
Madam!
You mustn't, Junji.

CHIBI
All right!
Hurry!

LUM
Hey, what are you doing?

MENDO
Hey, what clever mockery are you guys doing in a place like that?

BODYGUARDS
WAH!!

SHINOBU
What...
Come here!

SIGN ON CLOCK
Defective.

SAKURA
Well, what now?
No matter how much we hurry,
it'll probably be a repeat performance of last night.

MENDO
Go to Tomobiki Ginza's Mach-ken!

SAKURA
Why, are you hungry?

MENDO
The street stall soba shop, Mach-ken.
The truth is, it's the Mendo family Tomobiki district Panic Center.
There's a Sea Harrier in there for escape use.

SAKURA
Indeed, you got your hands on a plane?

PALMER
Phew, dirty, isn't it.

MEGANE
Is there any reason we can't stop just a minute for a drink?

MENDO
Mendo residence, this is Shutaro -- Come in, over.

VOICE
Yes, Shanghai Restaurant!
Sorry, we've sent out three orders of char-shew-men.

MENDO
Nobody asked you!

MENDO
Sakura, please get in.
Upon our arrival at the mansion, I'll send round a helicopter for you.
The rest of you, wait for it here!
Ah...

ATARU
We've come this far, haven't we!?

MEGANE
If we're like this, all in the same boat,
it's ``hostile states, same boat.''
We'll go as far as the depths of Hell.

MENDO
Do as you please!
Maybe you'll fall off!

MEGANE
We did it, we did it!

MEGANE
Those are the lights of Tomobiki, Wings. What a sight.

PALMER
(To ``Star Blazers'' theme...)
Farewell, Tomobiki, the ship departs...

ATARU
He's truly tone-deaf.

MENDO
Quiet!

MEGANE
Hm?
That...
That's...!

VOICE
WHAT!?!

VOICE
THAT'S CRAZY!!
Wah---!

SAKURA
Mendo!
Go around the outer orbit of the city!

ATARU
That is certainly...

SAKURA
My Uncle, after all.

ATARU
Oh...!

MEGANE
I thought we hadn't seen him lately, but in a place like that...

VOICE
Hey, look!

VOICE
Onsen-mark...

MENDO
What!?
Out of gas?!

ATARU
That's...
But we can still fly for a few minutes.

MENDO
It can't be helped.
We'll go back.

PALMER
Go back, you say -- To that city?

MENDO
Is there any other?
Or shall I drop you off on Cherry's head?

MENDO
It's no use, it won't carry us as far as Mach-ken.
I'll make a nearby hard landing!
Hang on!

MOTHER
Obnoxious, isn't it, at a time like this...

LUM
Mother, Father, we're home!

VOICE
Good evening!
We're in your debt tonight, too!

FATHER
You don't say?!

PALMER
One can whole fancy tomatoes!
Twelve packs of beef udon!
Sixteen cups of yaki-soba, the ones with the soup.
Three liters of cola!

MEGANE
Palmer!
Is ``Chicken of the Sea'' flaked tuna OK?

PALMER
Two bags of flour, one dozen spaghetti, two bottles of safflower oil.
Three cases of Tarako salt, five boxes of cheese biscuits,
two things of tofu.

CHIBI
170 yen, 230 yen, 572 yen, 100 yen, the last one is 125 yen.

PALMER
That comes to 10,820 yen...

KAKUGARI
Well, let's go!
If we loiter, we'll get scolded by Ataru's mother.

MEGANE
Chibi, what's that chocolate in your shirt?

CHIBI
Ha, ha, ha...
Well, um, I saw it was half eaten.
It was in the bean jam.

MEGANE
With the cooking supplies, down to a pack of bubblegum,
we will follow Ataru's mother's directions.
I am afraid you have forgotten this fundamental rule!

MEGANE
This town's food, down to one grain of rice,
down to the last Pocky stick, is everyone's joint property.
And you put that in your hand for the sake of greed!
This act deserves death.

CHIBI
I'll put it back.

MEGANE
Go to the police station.
As soon as we return, we'll open a public court to punish you!

CHIBI
Wah -- NO!

PALMER
Fool...

MEGANE
IOU 10,823 yen...

MEGANE
Let's go!

MEGANE
My name is Megane.
Formerly, I attended Tomobiki High School as an ordinary
high school student, continuously fighting the daily tedium,
I was a person wearing clogs.
But that night, from the ****pit of a Sea Harrier,
I witnessed that shocking spectacle, that greatly changed my destiny.

MEGANE
Since the day after we crash-landed in Ataru's house in the Harrier,
the world has changed its attitude
assuming a completely defiant attitude.
The same city as always...
The same corner stores as always...
The same parks as always...
But something is different...

MEGANE
The shadows of cars, coming and going, have disappeared from the streets...
The sounds of pianos, in the gardens of the ready-built houses,
have also ceased...
There are no people eating hurriedly at the counters
of the beef udon shops.
In this city --
No, in this world --
Besides just us, these dear people have suddenly disappeared.
Many days, unending Armageddon was passing.

MEGANE
Who in the world expected this quiet, this too-soon end?
The culture that the human race strenuously built in bygone days
over many thousands of years, the Christian age, has ended.

MEGANE
However, for us who were left behind,
the end is no more than a new beginning.
Since the day the world announced its end,
we began the battle of everyday survival.

MEGANE
Oddly enough, the convenience store near Ataru's house,
without the rush for desolation, put an end to that brave posture,
displaying an abundant stock of groceries, daily necessities, etc.
Then again, strangely enough, there was also electricity
in Ataru's house...
Both gas and running water continued to be supplied as before...
Astonishingly enough, the daily paper is still being delivered.

MEGANE
Naturally, we established Ataru's house as our base
for the ``maintenance of the human race.''
However, for some reason,
Miss Sakura quickly opened the Haratama beef udon shop,
to declare her self-support.
Next, Ryunosuke and her father opened a ``Father and Son (?)''
seaside teashop behind the high school.
Then, Mendo...

MEGANE
He was riding around in the tank one day,
probably dissolved by frustration.
Occasionally we return fire.
I don't know why he's dissatisfied, but the truth is, I don't care.

MEGANE
How many months have passed since that fateful night...?
But now, neither clocks nor calendars are of any use.
We have been guaranteed food, clothing, shelter, for our survival,
we haven't chosen any kind of leader.
An Earthly paradise...
Perhaps we will realize that eternal Shangri-La.
Ah...
The charms and anxieties of the chosen ones are with us!
When we recognize that the future of the human race
rests entirely on our shoulder --
the excitement, resembling giddiness, will not be forbidden!

CHIBI
Hey, what's the matter, Megane?

PALMER
Sunstroke...?!
So wear a hat.

MEGANE
By Megane.
Excerpt from the introduction to Chapter 3,
``Surmounting the End'', of Volume 1 of
``Complete History of Tomobiki''.

LUM
Yahoo!

MEGANE
Hey!
Wah...

MEGANE
Ah!

LUM
Hey -- Darling!

VOICES
Wah!
Wah!

SHINOBU
Got it!

MEGANE
Ah, it's a masterpiece.

MEGANE
Now, one broth...

PALMER
Just a minute, the onions...

LUM
Yes, here's seconds.

BODYGUARDS
Oh!
No objections.

LUM
Mom, it's just not enough.

LUM
We'll not have any soon, and...
Hm?

MOTHER
Yes, yes, yes.
Really!
Although Ataru by himself is troublesome..
Ah, Shinobu, use the onions as far as the green part, all right?

SHINOBU
Yes, I know, ma'am.

MOTHER
Really, you've saved me.
Shinobu is such a help.
I wish I'd had her here all the time, she's perfect.

SHINOBU
Oh, *GOSH*, ma'am!

LUM
Grr...

LUM
Yahoo!

LUM
Shutaro, will you go swimming with me?

MENDO
Oh, Lum.
Well, now, I'm a little...

LUM
Why don't you play with everyone else?

MENDO
Because I want to investigate a little.
So...

LUM
Hmm...

TEN
Lum, if we don't hurry, the water'll get cold.

TEN
Yah -- I want a sip!

LUM
Ha, ha!

MENDO
Lum, what do you think of this world?

LUM
It's a lot of fun.
See you later.

VOICE
Auntie, it's gone already -- Next Course!

MOTHER
Yes! How about a salad?

LUM
Yes, Mother.

MOTHER
Oh, Lum -- Uh, where's Shinobu?

LUM
Well, I don't know.

MOTHER
Strange, isn't it.
Where do you suppose she went?
Well, if she's gone somewhere else, she'll come back soon...?

MENDO
But Shinobu didn't come back.
When next morning came...

MENDO
Then, again...

RYUNOSUKE'S FATHER
Ryunosuke---!

MENDO
Ryunosuke disappeared.
While making a pot of oden...
Just as if she'd casually gone to the washroom for a while...
Our desperate search being ineffective,
nothing whatever was found out about the pair's whereabouts.

MENDO
WAH!

MENDO
I found her!
It's Shinobu!

SAKURA
After all...

MENDO
Shinobu!
Shinobu!

SAKURA
Calm down, Mendo.
Ryunosuke might be down there, too, with a likeness,
but that is an image!

MENDO
Image?!

SAKURA
Thanks for your help.
I'll pull you up now.
(To herself)
To say nothing of my Uncle.
Onsen-mark approached the heart of the matter without a moment's delay.
Then, Shinobu and Ryunosuke, whom Ataru made passes at.
No matter how I look at it, it's my turn next.

LETTER
Without talking to other people,
I want to meet with you to talk alone.
Attend me at once, to discuss what you think of the way of this world,
with regards to our existence...
I will be waiting this evening,
behind the Tomobiki High School clock tower. -- Sakura

ATARU
Sakura---!
Sorry to keep you waiting!

MENDO
Welcome, Moroboshi.

ATARU
Mendo, why are you here?

SAKURA
I called him.

ATARU
Well, you said to meet you alone, without talking to the others...?

SAKURA
A lie.

ATARU
I'm going back!

MENDO
Go back, eh?
Where do you intend to go back to, Moroboshi!

SAKURA
It's true that I have to speak.
Won't you just listen?

ATARU
Yeah, yeah...

MENDO
It's me, you see, Moroboshi...
While all of you have been idling the time away
while playing in this mixed-up world,
I haven't been riding around in a tank just for fun.
Keeping in touch with Sakura,
I'm investigating the organization of this world,
and we're planning a way to return to our own world, somehow.

ATARU
Thanks for the trouble...

MENDO
How difficult were those days...?
I just played!
Forgetting everything, I passed the days happily with.Lum!

ATARU
You should get accustomed to doing strange things.

MENDO
What!
Not even understanding the situation you've been put in,
you're getting fat!

SAKURA
Stop it!
Will you calm down, Mendo.
Introduce the main question.

MENDO
Sorry.
To continue...
For the sake of brainless old you, I'll explain things in logical order.
All right?
This table is our world, riding on that huge turtle --
in short, it's Tomobiki.

MENDO
Now, this is your house.
I myself will represent the range of the main gun of the Leopard,
and according to the measured results,
the center of this world is situated in this circle,
with diameter of about 2 kilometers.
The main street is the center of the world.
The fact that a world like this is flying in the sky
on the back of a turtle is unusual enough,
but the problem is in a particular place.
Why is the Moroboshi house the only one that is still supplied with gas,
running water, and electricity?
No -- in the first place, from where are they being supplied?
Has a bill arrived?

MENDO
You and Megane and the others are eating like crazy,
but why doesn't the convenience store run out of groceries?!
Again, where have the other citizens of this town disappeared to?!
And that in only one night!
Eh?
Why?!

ATARU
Do I know?

MENDO
Everyday life is not without inconveniences;
no, in order to do away with the inconveniences of everyday life,
this world is becoming really mixed up;
nonsensical;
one could well say, preposterous!
A world like this is physically impossible.
Therefore, if it exists...

ATARU
Only in a dream...
Right?

MENDO
Moroboshi!
You knew that?!

ATARU
I've suspected it for a long time now.
Megane and the others have, too.
It's just an unspeakable story, with too cheap a conclusion.

MENDO
Knowing that, why play around every day!
That attitude of yours, I...!

ATARU
For the time being, why not just play?!
Because we don't know whose dream it is!

MENDO
Oho---?
You don't know?!
I see, I see!
You don't know!
Ha, ha, ha -- it serves you right!
You don't know!
Ha, ha, ha...
Great bathing beach-houses...!
*I* know!

MENDO
All right?
Moroboshi, it's a simple problem of elimination.

MENDO
It certainly can't be Sakura or I,
or Shinobu or Ryunosuke who disappeared.
It must be an annoyance to your parents to have so many people
in their house, therefore exclude them.
It is certainly not yourself, Moroboshi.
If it were, right now this world would be filled with women.

ATARU
How well you know me...

MENDO
Jari-Ten, the baby pig,
and the father of the missing Ryunosuke being out of the question,
five people remain.
Megane and the others are living happily under one roof with Lum --
the four being in one place is the problem.
If it were their dream,
naturally they would steal an unrestricted march on the rest.
I don't think any of them would be charitable enough
to just make the other three think virtuous thoughts.
If that's the case...
Lum...!?

ATARU
Why her?

MENDO
What, is there a mistake in my reasoning?

ATARU
Apart from the other things,
making Shinobu and Ryu disappear -- Really.
She's not the type of woman who'd do a thing like that.
Living with her for so many years, I know her well.

MENDO
Moroboshi, you impudent...!

SAKURA
Concerning that point, I too am of the same opinion.
The story up to now being an outline, let's shoot at the main point.
Only, the Princess is Lum --
The turtle, inviting people to the Dragon Palace to the bitter end!
To make Lum's desires real this way,
is forgetting the existence of the one who made this world.

ATARU
Yes, yes, that's it, that's it.

SAKURA
What are you admiring -- I'm talking about you!

ATARU
Eh?!
But, what do you mean by that?

SAKURA
I'm saying, therefore you're the turtle!

ATARU
Ha, ha, ha!
Tell me another one, Sakura!
That's it -- I made this world?!

SAKURA
As you say!

ATARU
Sakura...
As a mere high school student, I can't do an outrageous thing like that!

SAKURA
The ``mere high school student'' is over there.
You can come out!

ATARU
Gack!!

REAL ATARU
Hello, hello.

ATARU
What in the world?
THIS?!

SAKURA
Schemer, you'll drown in schemes.
You intended to set a trap, but you fell into a trap.
After receiving my letter, do you think this guy would wait until night?

REAL ATARU
Heh, heh, heh...
I came to Sakura as soon as I got it.
Since noon.
Ha, ha, ha...

SAKURA
To the business of earlier this evening.
Shall I try to break this world?!

SAKURA
Visit!!

``ATARU''
Oh no, I'm discovered?
Two of us, and one is evil.

MENDO
We're prepared for you, shape-changer!

MENDO
Eh?!

SAKURA
Step back - to you, he's no toothless opponent.
Whatever he looks like, he's the Evil Dream Demon!

DEMON
Yes, I am certainly the Evil Dream Demon.
Nice to meet you.
But, sister, you don't know everything about me.

SAKURA
Shall I tell?!
``Evil Dream Demon'' reads ``Evil Demon of Dreams''!
To show the meaning of that name,
the Evil Demon rejoices in manipulating dreams,
sowing the seeds of the Evil Demon in everyone!
The darkest parts of blood-smeared history.
In there, usually squirming in darkness, was he!
Who beguiled a bashful art student into an insane dictator?!!
Why did the famous emperor --
loving poetry, having a good government --
destroy the capital by fire at the end of his bloody despotism!?!
The pious disciple who betrayed his teacher,
the faithful friend who killed that sworn friend by sword.
The heart of Gautama, too,
was deluded while getting thorough training under the spiritual tree,
and Adam and Eve also ate the forbidden fruit --
Completely losing sight of themselves in the questionable dreams
you inspired!

DEMON
Won't you wait just a minute, sister?
What grounds in the world do you have for saying that!?

SAKURA
Grounds?
In the Complete Shrine Maiden's Handbook ``Best 100 Evil Spirits'',
it says so clearly.
Excuses are useless!
I don't know what you are planning by making Lum's dream,
but exposing your true form like this, has also crushed your plans!
Quickly, let us out of this dream, and depart!

DEMON
If you listen to what this sister says, I seem to be a devil.

SAKURA
You are like that!

DEMON
You're joking!
Hey, well, you learn many tricks from mortals,
but I am remarkably long-lived!
That's it...
I'm a scoundrel.
I've lived a long time.
Hey, I've made a lot of different people have dreams.
Sister, I am certainly the person who spun the dream
of the person you spoke of, the one you're in.
But, you misunderstand me, you've got it all wrong.

DEMON
I just create dreams of what I think the person wants to see.
So therefore, if the dream becomes evil,
that is because it is that person's evil wish.

SAKURA
``A person's heart is made up of good and evil.''
It's the overused sophistry of scientists.

DEMON
You're exaggerating -- I make good dreams, too!
But still, if everyone were long-lived, it would be weird, wouldn't it.
Leaving me behind, everyone becoming an evil dream.
The last one will end up being eaten by a tin trumpet, eh?

DEMON
Whenever that happens,
I search again for a fragment of a special dream, from there to here...
>From here to there, I return to the same thing.
I'm already tired out.
Already I'd rather stop giving people dreams.
I'll go out with a ``bang.''
I thought that way would be easier, somehow.

DEMON
It was that kind of time, when I found her...
She was at an aquarium somewhere.

DEMON
She understood me at once.
She was born under very different stars...

SAKURA
Well, it's because she's an alien.

DEMON
Say, do you like fish?

LUM
Not particularly...

DEMON
Hey, did you have a fight with your boyfriend?
It looks like he didn't show up, so you came here by yourself.

DEMON
Hey, this is the kind of person I am.

LUM
Mr. Evil Dream Demon? I'm Lum.

DEMON
Miss Lumdatchya?
Oh, Lum!
It's sweet -- a little bitter, but a good name.
(To Sakura)
That's how I met her...

LUM
Dreams?

DEMON
Yes, my work is making dreams.
Fun dreams, sad dreams, scary dreams -- Well I work extensively.
But, that's it, you see --
After making one last dream, I'm going to retire.
With regards to personal relations, my sufferings are many...
I'm in the service industry, after all, you see?
Ha, ha, ha...

LUM
Hm...

DEMON
Well, how would you like to be my last job?
Will you let me make ``Lum's Dream''?
Of course, there's no charge.
What do you say?

LUM
My dream?

DEMON
I have been searching for a long time.
I changed during a bad dream,
and I want to create a world of pure, eternal dreams.
It's OK if it's you.
You understand me.
So, give me your answer.

LUM
Heh, heh, heh...
My dream, eh?
With Darling...
And Mother and Father, and Ten, and Shutaro, and Megane and the others,
I want to live happily ever after.
That's my dream.

DEMON
Heh, thank you, thank you.
Thanks very much for your kind attention.
No, sister.
Don't do anything with that youthfulness.
Although I once thought I might become nothing,
I've discovered youth at the end, haven't I?

DEMON
After all, I kept pace with the history of the dreams of the human race,
they weren't my enemies.
Hey, now, calm down.
Ah, for the sake of Lum (and my reputation),
what I said before, that is the truth.
For the sake of feelings saying it was a good dream.
Going away in the shadows of the people I've helped, getting conceited,
this dream-city is the safest aftercare in exchange for giving them
daydreams-to-go.

DEMON
This, too, is the spirit of the Evil Dream Demon!
His conscience.
However, for the present, this dream has been made secure.
Because brats and asses are foolish.
But I took the role of ``Ataru-the-foolish'' as a matter of course,
truly giving spirit to the management of the dream...

DEMON
It's a delicate boundary, isn't it...
Heh, heh, heh.
Huh?
Wah!
Wh -- What how did you get loose?!

ATARU
Uncle, thinking I'd knock you down if you'd messed with Lum,
I jumped off the verandah, and fell in the water.
I climbed up just now.

UNCLE
I see, I see, so now you'll repeat it?
Hold on, brother.

ATARU
Well, so now we square off!
Uncle, how's this -- Won't you make a deal with me?

DEMON
Cut the crap.
Tell me the merit in dealing with you!

ATARU
The thing Sakura gave me to use in self-defense.

DEMON
Brother, that's a deal!

ATARU
Ha, ha, ha -- I did it, I did it.
At last, my eternal dream has become a reality.
Ha, ha, ha...

DEMON
Well, with this around, you'll probably be at peace.

DEMON
It's not to my taste.
But if I think about it, it's like this after all.
I don't understand the deal very well.
He's foolish.

ATARU
Hey, uncle!

DEMON
What -- Is there something else?

ATARU
Look around -- Lum's not here in these girls.
What happened to her?

DEMON
What are you talking about now?

ATARU
Lum's not here.
Why isn't she here?
Hm?
What's the matter?

DEMON
What are you thinking?
I thought you meant to escape from that girl, what?

ATARU
Ha, ha -- Indeed, for a person so long-lived,
you're a very poor judge of human character.
The reason is -- I've grown up.

ATARU
All right, listen up.
Just like the other girls, I've taken a fancy to Lum, on schedule.
Only, she interferes if I mix with other girls;
and as it turns out, I just go running back to her.
Understand?
If you understand, hand over Lum!
If Lum's left out of the harem, it's an imperfect dream.
I'll ruin a thing like that, and return to reality!

DEMON
You rascal!?
Cut it out!
Just try and do that!!

ATARU
Ouch!

ATARU
What's this?

DEMON
AHH!
Give it back, that's important, it will call Baku...
OOP!!

ATARU
Baku?!
Ha, ha, Sakura told me about that.
The legendary beast that eats bad dreams?
I see, so that's it?

DEMON
Not again, not this again.
Why do humans do these things?

ATARU
Uncle, what are you going to do?
Will you give me Lum?
Will you?

DEMON
What an ass!
Can *I* do a thing like that?!
In the first place, this world is that girl's dream!

ATARU
Well, I will return to reality and ruin this dream,
by blowing this thing!

DEMON
No, I will protect that girl's pure dream!

ATARU
What do you mean, pure!
Dragging us in, unknowing?!
I'm going to blow it.

DEMON
Wah!
Stop, stop!
Do you know what you're doing?!

ATARU
You're the same as Lum.
You still don't understand my policy of acting with
out thought of the consequences?!
I'll return to reality!
(Blows horn)

ATARU
Wh -- What's that noise?

DEMON
You rascal.
That tin trumpet will run amok.
My important dream is being ruined!

DEMON
Ass!
Fool!
Scum!
Dick!
*Sob!*

ATARU
Calm down.
At any rate, what's a dream, really!
It's all right!

DEMON
Don't you understand anything?
How different reality is, from the dreams I make.
Living in other people's dreams ever since I was born,
continuing other people's dreams...
Just once I'd like to have my dream!
Why did you have to ruin that!?

ATARU
Wah!!

CHERRY
Oh, isn't that the unlucky young man, over there?

ATARU
Cherry!
Just like a priest -- Where were you loafing?!!

CHERRY
In this white space.
This world is completely an illusion.
If you wake up, it will all be resolved.

ATARU
Shout!

DEMON
Expert, I won't let you escape!!

ATARU
Ungh...
Ah, where am I!?
What am I doing?

MENDO
Woke up at last?
A loud snore in this wintry air feels good.

ATARU
I see...
After buying beef udon for dinner, I fell asleep...?
That city was completely that Evil Dream Demon's dream, too...
But, it really was a dream in poor taste.

MENDO
Hmph, well, you're a parrot, aren't you, saying ``dream''.
While you were having it, it was desperately real.
But if you think about it, there's no proof that this instant,
talking with you like this, is not a dream.

ATARU
Ha, ha, ha, it can't be...

DEMON
You can't be.
I told you you wouldn't escape.
It's just you.
You absolutely will not get away!

ATARU
Wah -- Idiot!
A red light!!

DEMON
Eh?!

ATARU
I'll faint again and get out.

ATARU
He's a rock-head like me.
Yah!

MOTHER
Ataru!
Ataru!
Get up, Ataru!

MOTHER
There's no spare time for fainting, Ataru!!

ATARU
Hm?
Wah!

ANNOUNCER
Mr. Moroboshi has stood up.
The indomitable man, Ataru Moroboshi,
will again challenge the fate of the Earth,
but there's scarcely 10 minutes left!
Can he grab the horns of Lum the demon girl, and save Earth?!

SHINOBU
Fight, Ataru!
For the sake of our marriage!

ATARU
That's so, isn't it.
For the sake of our marriage...
Hey, Lum!
Look at this!

LUM
Ah!
All right, you!
Give me back my Sunday best!

ATARU
Goal...

ATARU
Wait -- If I don't catch these horns, the beginning...

ANNOUNCER
AHH!!
Time's up!
Time is up!
What could this mean?!
What was he thinking of, this enemy of Earth -- Ataru Moroboshi!
This traitor!!

VARIOUS VOICES
You good-for-nothing!
Ne'er-do-well!
Scum! Kill!

ATARU
Gack!!

VOICES
You traitor!
Scum!
Vermin!
Apologize by dying!
Blockhead!!

ATARU
Ungh...

MEGANE
I did it!
At last it's a success!

DWARF
Congratulations, Doctor.

ATARU
My name is Franken-Ataru.
I was in a coma of unknown origin,
and revived in this world as an artificial person.
Why did I develop a high tolerance for high voltages?
I guess I was lucky.

ATARU
Lucky...!?
But only looks filled with hostility were waiting for me in this world.
Everybody hates me, the ones who speak are stupid, no one approaches me.
(To girl)
Ah...

DEMON
Say, what are you doing to that girl?
Don't touch her!

ATARU
Th - That fiend!
Fool!
None of your cheap tricks!
Without fail, I will return to reality!

NARRATOR
The two, riding on a gust of wind, approached each other.
They approach the point of contact, of life and death!

DEMON
I won...

ATARU
(Pants)
Hah, hah...

FATHER'S VOICE
Have you woken up?
Ataru -- You're probably surprised,
but for no listen closely to what your father says.
If you are listening to this tape,
neither your mother nor your father exist in this world.

FATHER'S VOICE
I and others spared no pains trying to make you and Lum
wake up from your mysterious coma.
However, the science of Earth at present --
no, not even the science of Urusei -- could make you two wake up.
Forgive us...
Trusting to your last wishes,
we have entrusted your fates to the future.
We think it may be possible, with the science of many centuries later,
to make you two wake up.

FATHER'S VOICE
Ataru, no matter what kind of era you are in,
live forcefully.
Lum's parents said to give their best regards to Lum.
This is the end of the talk; but the cost of the gold slip --
please take care of the 500 year loan.
Farewell, Ataru...

ATARU
400 years after the emergency...!?
Wah!

ATARU
WAH!!

ATARU
Ah...
Wah!
What, not a set?!

DEMON
You!
I can't get the next one prepared, if you come out when I'm not ready!
Take this!

DEMON
Now, remarkably, as if you've been answered.
I think you'll think of a good dream.

DEMON
And reality is good...
Therefore, ask me to do a dream over.
No matter many times, I'll bring you back.
Say, do you know of this?
A man dreamed that he was a butterfly, but upon awakening,
and realizing which self was real, maybe, he thought,
his real self was the butterfly he dreamed of?
Well, dream or reality, after all it's your point of view.
If so, wouldn't you rather have an amusing way of life in a dream
that I make for you?
Even you -- No matter how absurd,
I'll make any kind of good dream for you.

DEMON
The dreams I make are the same as reality...
Therefore, it would be bad if they didn't end, so I won't do that.
So I'll wait up above, and I'll come when you decide.
No, no -- If you'd just climb these stairs, that would be better.
Well, I'll be waiting.

GIRL
Brother, why do you want to go back?

ATARU
Brother, huh?
It's for the sake of the woman I love -- It hurts, being of that woman.
I don't suppose you understand, because you're a girl.

GIRL
Shall I tell you?

ATARU
Eh, do you know? Do you know the way to return to reality?

GIRL
Everyone knows. You're just forgetting to wake up.

GIRL
Do this -- Jump off of here.
Then, if you keep your eyes open until you reach the bottom,
call out the names of all the people you want to meet.
The people whose names you don't call out will surely be disagreeable
when you open you eyes.
It'll be OK if you do that.
Because you're full of women that you want to meet.

GIRL
In exchange for that...
Promise me something?

ATARU
Yes?

LITTLE LUM
Be responsible!

ATARU
WAH!

ATARU
AHH!

ATARU
Ran!
Oyuki!
Benten!
Shinobu!
Sakura!

ATARU
Ryoko!
Otama!
Ryunosuke!
Tsuyuko!

ATARU
Kintaro's nurse!
One girl in the flower shop!
Kaede!

ATARU
The dolphin girl!
Mom!!
LUM!
LUM!!!

ATARU
Ooh...
This brat doesn't know anybody's troubles.
Get up, blockhead!

ATARU
Hm?
Hah!

LUM
Darling...
Darling, I had a dream.
Darling, and Ten, and Mother and Father, and Megane and the others...

ATARU
Lum, that's a dream.
Only a dream.

VOICE
AHEM!!

ATARU
Aha...

LUM
Go on...

ATARU
Don't talk crazy.
Can you do a disgraceful thing like that in front of people??

LUM
Why?
How come?
Why can't you do it in front of people?
If you love me, you ought to be able to!

ATARU
When did I say I loved you?!

LUM
What!
Still saying that kind of vexing thing?!

ATARU
Wah -- Stop, stop.
YAH!

WORKMAN 1
Hey, those two are at it again.

WORKMAN 2
Really!
Because for them, there's neither progress nor growth.

WORKMAN 2
Do it til you die.

DEMON
The truth of the matter is...
It's no easy matter to associate with those people.
Shall we go?

THE END


E n r i q u e C o n t y
jester@ihlpl.att.com

 

I found these scripts on an obscure FTP server, so thought I'd add them here for your enjoyment.

 

if there was a word counter u would defenetely be on top of that now ^_^

//Aldamel, ponderin on actually reading the scripts