Recreation Sex: Before or after marriage?

The topic: Sex always turns up whenever there's a discussion between your close group of friends. And the question "Would you 'do it" before or after marriage?" is often asked, ^^ So I would like to hear a few different opinion from a more diverse group of people. Sex before or after marriage?(Why?)

Heres my personal opinion, many might feel the same way as I do about Sex being something special between two people who are deeply in love. A way to express their emotions and feelings for one another but one fact one must never be forgotten: Sexual intercourse is also raw pleasure! It releases stress from your life and best of all it's not a pill you take every hour..( ^^ Of course depending on the person you are.) oO So I believe in sexual act before marriage, I mean it'll still be with a special person that you, to a certain extend, come to love and care for but he won't be the "One true love" that everyone is out looking for, but if you feel a special and deep connection with that person then what the heck, go for it. I read articles from certain magazines such as "Cosmopolitan," one particular issue discussed about whether sex before or after marriage and one of the responses said..Quote.."Sex before marriage is definitely for me, I mean what would happen if that special person I care for a lot suddenly died?" Regretting something you didn't do, [In my opinion] is alot worse than regretting something you did do. I'm at my teenage years right now and marriage is far from my mind while sex is just around the corner. So I don't know, maybe my opinion will change in the future but at the moment mine says: Sex before marriage! ^^

 

We've already got a thread on sex, but...

I don't really care when people do it. It's their business, not mine. As for myself, if it happens before marriage, it happens. I'm not really too concerned about it.

 

i'll drink to that
besides, marriage is sometimes impossible for a couple for many reasons (e.g. financial) so perhaps marriage isn't really necessary for a couple to show their love for each other.

 

*checks your profile to make sure of what sex you are*
*sees female*

Champagne, ma chere?

 

:shy3:
don't mind if I do

 

Not to mention all the gay couples who may not even have the option of marrying. So, really, what are they supposed to do? Abstain completely for the rest of their lives?

I'm really with Neph on this one. Whether it's within wedlock or not, the important decisions about sex are the ones that involve being respectful, responsible, and safe. Marriage is kind of secondary to that. What's important is being comfortable with what you're doing, being informed, doing it responsibly, etc. If you need to be married to feel OK with having sex, well, that's not really a problem either - it's a personal decision.

And, y'know.. when it happens, it happens. I'm certainly not planning to make marriage a prerequisite for having sex, but I will make sure I'm in a stable, healthy, happy relationship first.

 

I agree with Dilandu's viewpoint (and therefore with Neph's. GASP!) on how marriage is really secondary to the other decisions made about sex. Though it is a way of reproduction, it is also a way to express feelings or abuse. When it is done doesn't matter as much as how it is done, and with what intentions it is done.

 

What other people decide to do doesn't bother me in the slightest, but in my opinion the notion of waiting for sex until marriage is old-fashioned. It's not expected anymore, at least where I live.
Some people never marry, albeit very few. Are they supposed to be celibate till they die? And yeah, I agree with what Dilandau said about the gay couples.
I think that all you need to do is listen to your own feelings. If your mind and your body are both saying yes then I say go for it! :catgirl:

 

To which I counter that not all unmarried individuals are hormone-influenced teenagers. ~_^ But I see your point.

Again, I see your point. On the other hand, doesn't that increase the likelihood that some sleazeball guys would marry just to get laid? Either that, or relieve their sexual frustrations by cheating or going to a prostitute?

Now... I don't support having sex as a way to keep a boyfriend loyal. ~_~ I'm just saying.

The point of marriage is to cement a bond, get financial benefits from the government, and show everyone else how strong your commitment to each other is. It's also used to provide a stable environment for children to be raised in.

I dunno... I just think that marriage isn't necessary for everyone. But, again, if you choose to wait, more power to ya. ^^

 

I dont really know if I'll ever get married, a very close bond with a soul mate is all I want. The hassle of ceremonys and way too tight constrictions seem unessesary to me. Unless her parents were ceremony hungry :anger2:

So yhea sex before marriage is fine with me. Desolated Neko summed up my thoughts pretty well back in post#1.

 

I don't think it really matters too much either. If marriage is such a strong and everlasting bond, why are there divorces?

 

Hm...I'd have to agree with Neph. It's thier own disicions.

 

Because sometimes people can't deal with eachother, or rushed into it.(cough J-lo cough)

 

Honestly I don't really think it should matter. If you really think about it, marraige is nothing more then a legal document. There are quite a few couples who have gotten married for financial reasons alone or on their parents wishes. Haven't you ever heard of an arranged marraige? I'm willing to bet that while the vast majority of couples marry on love, there are still a sizeable percentage who don't. There are some people who, for whatever reason, cannot get married, but they may very well be closer to their partner then any married couple they know.

 

i voted for sex after marriage, dont know why it just seems like a right thing to do. maybe im old fashioned :anime:

 

I'm curious - in general, are we talking about personal preference or about what we feel is morally better for society? I mean, I know I said before that I really don't care if other people wait or not, because I think that the right choice varies by the individual. But is there anyone here who thinks it's actually immoral, inappropriate, or damaging to have sex before marriage, in most or all cases? (I think it stands to reason that a lot of people have sex before they should, because they're not responsible about it or are simply not prepared... but you know what I'm getting at.)