Humour What Barney really is

Given: Barney is a CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR
Prove: Barney is satanic


The Romans had no letter 'U', and used 'V' instead for
printing, meaning the Roman representation would for
Barney would be: CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR

CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR

Extracting the Roman numerals, we have:
CV V L DI V

And their decimal equivalents are:
100 5 5 50 500 1 5

Adding those numbers produces: 666.

666 is the number of the Beast.

 

Bah, you can find evil in anything, if you look hard enough. Barney's evil because he's Barney, not because some random phrase can possibly have 666 in it.

 

The Romans also didn't speak English. Let's see you incorporate THAT into your equation, mister smartypants.

 

both of you killed the humour, thanks.

 

I'm gonna go with:

A) You found this joke on a web site

or

B) You have a lot of free time.

In any of the two, I get the joke, but I don't think it's that funny. And like Neph said, romans don't speak English, nor do they think 666 is the number of the beast or whatever ("Gladiator" can teach you more than just plain killing! ^o^)

-Seishin

 

I have a habit of killing bad jokes.

 

It's C, all of the above. After all, this is Nightmare.

 

Now thats justice.

 

The man speaks words of wisdom. Nightmare, you my friend, are what we call a "special" member of BJP. We love you very much, and people say, "nice" things about you. ^_^ This is some pretty weird stuff man.

 

is that a we or is that just a personal opinion Either way it may be a lil cruddy on humour but it made me laugh

 

...but we're still all agreed that Barney is evil, right?

~W

 

yes barney is evil. So nightmare, my dear dear friend, how did you come by this information. And yes barney has piosioned our water supplies, pilliged our ships, burned our crops, and secretly assatinated my family. He also is my day job. (<----kidding)

 

the number 666 and the beast are from hte bible.

 

haha, i found your post funnier than the Barney joke.

 

Thanks for the newsflash, ace!

 

The number 666 is a biblical derivative. It supposedly is some demonic perversion of the 333 trinity and it is said that the 'beast' that will bring about the final battle ( across the fields of Armegeddon) will bear that number.

The person who wrote it already had a "beast" in mind. It's been so long since I've gone over this, but it's said that the king of the jewish nation at the time was a real bastard and the man who wrote the book of revelation was submitting the story simply as symbolism to help lead the people of his time away from the corrupt jewish king before it was 'too late' in terms of thier salvation.

Ironically enough this 666 has carried forth through out the ages and it seems every generation has a few people it can apply to. Everyone from Hitler, to Bill Gates, to Clinton seems to fall under this "mark of the beast".

If you try hard enough you can make just about anyone fall under this catagory.

...and I still believe Barney is the anti-christ re-incarnated in a purple, plushy form. It's only a matter of time now...


We have all been programmed under his power when we were little. It's too late anymore.

:dizzy2:

~W

 

Goodie I'm so glad Barney never became popular here! I only got to see it during the Power Ranger period, and dubbed in German.. since my German was/is bad, I couldn't understand most of it, lucky me! My mind has not been tainted by the evil Barney!..
Okay randomly posted, but I don't feel like repeating what anyone else would've said before me.. ;p

 

More info: ive looks up info, i have waay to much time on my hands

• 
  [*]Yes I am a random person, Im special theres no one on these forums excaclty like me
  

• I'm not claiming that Barney is Satan (though some have [7]), however there are some disturbing parallels between Barney and Darth Vader.

suspicians of what barney really is:​

1.He's some evil supernatural entity posing as a warm, cuddly
parent figure in order to train young children to be his
unholy army of ultimate darkness.

You know, the more I think about this one, the more likely it
seems. Look at the facts. Kids LOVE him, and no one knows why.
Obviously, there are unclean forces at work here. The way to
test this out would be to confront the fiend with a bloody
crucifix.
2. He's a space alien.

This would explain a lot. Barney, as a xenomormorph, might
have access to all sorts of technology that we couldn't even
begin to comprehend: hypnosis beams, holographic projectors,
even large-scale matter re-assemblers. All of theses could
account for the "powers of imagination" as depicted on the
show. As for his motives and purpose, see above.

How do we stop him?​

1) Wait for him to go away.
Most media darlings eventually do this, however, our
children's BRAINS are at stake.
2) Stuff a chicken and rock salt in his mouth, then sew his lips
shut.
You could, in fact, fit several chickens in there.
3) Find out where his power supply is and unplug him.
If he's a space alien, he may well be a robot. Let's hope he
doesn't have a breeder reactor in his tail. (Now that I think
of it, he probably gets his power from...The Children's
Television Workshop. Cut their funding!)
4) Stop believing in him.
Scoff if you will, but this has worked with others recorded in
history.

If by some chance you DO encounter The Hellspawn(barney) in active
mode, take these steps:​

*DO NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT!*
His eyes have power. He uses them to possess people. If you
gaze too long upon his countenance, you will be HIS, body and
soul. The effect isn't as obvious on T.V., at least not with
adults.
*DO NOT LET HIM SING TO YOU!*
The real danger comes, from the seductive quality of his Song
Of Entrapment:
I love you....
Etc...
Etc...
Etc...
Won't you say you love me too?
If you DO say you love him, then he OWNS your soul and all its
accessories. And we'll have to kill you too.
*ACT CASUAL.*
Lull him into a false sense of security. Pretend you want an
autograph for your nephew. If you're especially skillful, you
can get him to sign an agreement to leave mortals alone for
all eternity.

Last resort​

*DESTROY HIM.*

Don't worry. If you've done everything right he won't suspect
a thing. The following methods will certainly annilihate most
creatures of darkness:

1) Poke him gently in the ribs with a bloody crucufix, saying
"Hey? Hey? Hey? Big fella?"

2) Blow pepper at him. Have a Holy Man of God ready to say "Bless
you," when he sneezes. Stand well back, so as not to get
Barney-bits all over you.

3) Blow his face off with a flare gun. ( i ashika love this part)

4) Cancel his show. (NOTE: You'd better be a PBS executive.)

5) Ask yourself. How would "MacGyver" handle this?

6) Decapitate him with a silver sword, on sacred ground, under a
3-D picture of Jesus, while drinking a glass of holy water
FROM THE FAR SIDE OF THE GLASS, with a bag over your head,
while singing "Amazing Grace", in a month with a "K" in it.
(Note: The sword MUST be blessed by His Holiness the Pope.
Otherwise, you're wasting your time.)

One of those ought to work. Give it a try. If you'd like to
field test any of these methods, use them on Rush Limbaugh.
All of the above applies to HIM, too.

There comes a time when we as a society must humbly admit our
wrongs and take whatever actions necessary to correct our
misdoings. Barney the dinosaur is one of the most hideous
creations of modern American culture and as such, he MUST be
destroyed. The termination of Barney must therefore become a
goal of all decent, responsible citizens. Only united can we
protect our children and stop his evil reign!
FOR ANYONE WHO DOUBTS THAT BARNEY IS EVIL INCARNATE
Just turn down volume on the TV the next time Barney appears.
Striped of his music ( such as the 'I love you, you love me'
chant, one of his most powerful spells ) Barney's ugliness
immediately becomes visible. I assure you, if you try this,
you will feel a chill as you watch the demonic blob silently
moving its mouth, gesturing, and dancing before you. After a
moment to recover your composure, you too will realize what
must be done.
* info from friends site i helped create*

 

;

Are you out of your mind?! What happened to the parallels between Barney and Darth Vader?

You know the Salem Puritans had fool proof method for dealing with evil in their populace.

Tie the offending evil to a tree and light the tree on fire. If you were serious about wiping the stain of the big purple dinosaur off the planet you would go with this tried and true method.

You might be asking yourself, "Did burning people alive really work?" Well, do you see any witches around today? Of course not. It worked like a charm.

After we do the Barney burning ceremony I have some tiger repellant for sale as well.

 

why would we need tiger repellant for just feed barney to the tiger after we cook it first that is best repellant there is or just give it to him alive