Humour Work Horror Stories

Post your stupid encounters here!

I work at a Canadian EB Games (so we're basically unaffected by the buyout from Gamestop), and a girl and her boyfriend enter the store. No big deal, a lot of couples seem to check out the games lately. They start looking through the computer games, when the girl picks up The Sims 2 DVD Edition. She studies the box heavily for a minute, then loudly asks...

"What the heck does dee-vee-dee mean?!"

The boyfriend turns a shade of red that would make a communist flag look pale and hastily guides her out of the store.

 

I was helping this lady with her deli order. She wanted the chicken meal deal, which comes with two salads/mojo family packs, gravy, and dinner rolls. Well, I'd gotten her everything except the rolls, and, I said to her "I'll just grab your buns really quick."

Total accidenty. She didn't notice at first, but I realized a few seconds after, and just started laughing my head off. Then she realized, and luckily, started laughing, and I apologized. It was hilarious, though.

I'm still laughing thinking about it.

Now, if you ask me, that was pretty close to being a perfect "Keitaro."

 

Was she cute and by herself? You could have developed a whole new adult video plotline.

 

Unfortunately, she was a (approximately) 30-35 year-old woman. Not really my cup o' tea, you know. Still, it was pretty funny.

 

lol.

this happend about 2 years ago... but i was at camp with my class mates, and we were in our cabins. (it was around 6 in the morning.) i decided to go out for a walk, so a went out into the crisp, morning air. then i heard some noise, so i turned around, and there was the exchange student from mexico (or something) standing in the door way of his cabin, wearing nothing but a towel. i thought nothing of it, until he dropped his towel and yelled: "I LOVE YOU~!!!"

that REALLY scared me for life...
lol. and something like that happend to me today too. ... why me?! lol.

 

...How was that work?

 

I was at the salon and I think it was my second day working there. This lady comes in, and I tell her, the bed is ready for you. So she gets in. Well once she gets out, and starts talking to me. I couldn't understand a word she said. She started making these swoosh swoosh sounds to my and rubbing her hands around in a circle in the air. I kinnda figured she ment she cleaned the tanning bed. Then " I think" she asked me if I wanted a ride on her wheel chair... I asked my mom about her later, and she said she had a stroke ( I just thought she didn't have a tounge and was crazy.) that was my second day of work.

 

Last night this kid comes in, looking to trade in his copy of Def Jam Fight for New York. I accidently think it's the first Def Jam game. "You get 12 bucks in credit."
"Awesome!"

Then I realise my mistake. "Oh wait, that's Fight for New York. That's wooooorth... 10 dollars in credit."
"10 dollars?! Forget it!"

It's a two dollar difference! How does this kids mind work?!

 

He's 12, at that stage in life every penny matters, you must have shattered his world when you took that $2 off him.

 

He seemed 13-14ish. I don't even know how he got his hands on a copy, but that 2 dollars in credit only wouldn't have gone very far.

 

Eh, it'll do him well to teach him that lifes a b*tch sometimes.

 

Once i had to do catwalk in a long dress and a really big and heavy headpiece, at the end of the stage my headpiece somehow fell of my head and because i was walking i accidentally kicked it. It flew off the stage and into a sitting guest's face. Luckily, the guest cought it just inch from his face. I was so embarassed and upset, the designer had to reassure me that everything's ok.

 

well, it wasn't really work, but more like a volenteer thing because i was a junior leader.

 

Ooo, I forgot about this one.

This guy comes in, girlfriend in tow and walks up to the register.

"Hey" he says.
"Heyah; can I get you a hand with anything?" I ask.
"Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... yeeeeah. I got this copy of EA NFL 2004, and I like paid the warranty on it."
"Oh, is something wrong with it?"
"No man, but I wanna trade it in for a copy of EA NFL 2005."
"Ok, it'll give you... (x amount of dollars) in credit."
"No man, I wanna trade it straight across."
"You can't do that."
"I paid the warranty though!"
"The warranty replaces the game if it gets damaged with a copy of the same game."
"Whaaaaaaaaat? Aw, man. "

Then he left, not saying another word.

Note: I forget which NFL game it actually was; there's a lot of football games out there but I'm sure it was EA NFL 2004 (or something named like that).

 

i work at a wal-mart equivalent (or whatever you yanks call them) i've had some good laughs.
an elderly lady came up to me during one shift and said
'excuse me sir can you tell me how to get out of here?'
'um, what do you mean?'
"the exit"
'turn left and follow the extra wide aisle" thinking silently 'the same way you came in?'

or there was the time a drugged out chick tried on some clothes without using the changing rooms. she was quickly hustled into the change room and thrown her clothes to put back on. when she emerged she was immediatly told to leave the store, but on the way out security noticed she was wearing a store jumper, so they asked her to remove it. which she did. Unfortunately she wasn't wearing anything under it.

 

Someone tried to bargain for a gameboy colour a few days ago.

"I'll pay 10."
"Sir, it's 20."
"10 and no more!"
"Then no gameboy. I can't lower prices."
"Fiiiiiine... I better get batteries with it!"
"Nope."
"Then how will I know it works?!"
"We test them. And if it doesn't work, bring it back within 30 days and you get your money back."
"...-Fine.- It better come with a game."
"No."
"How about 30 dollars for the gameboy and two games?"
"If you can find two games priced at 5 dollars, sure."

*half an hour later*

"Total comes to 40 dollars sir."
"What?!"
"Well. The gameboy is priced at 20. This game is 15, and this one is 5."
"Why can't I barter?"
"Because that isn't the way we do things in this culture, sir."
"Savages."
"Sir, please pay. Then leave."

 

I'd've been fighting to stop laughing at that one, Neph. lolz0r.

Well, better than my work life's been the past couple of days. We've got a bunch of new people, (like, 4 or 5) and none of them know what to do. So you can imagine the "hilarity" of all of them working with me, while I'm trying to serve customers. It's like:

Customer: I'd like- *cut off*
Newbie 1: How do I use the slicer?
Me: I'll tell you in a minute. I'm sorry sir, what did you say you wanted?
Customer: 200 grams of- *cut off again*
Newbie 2: How long do you deep fry wings for?
Me: 3 minutes. And you wanted 200 of what, I'm sorry?
Customer: Of that. *points*
Me: Of the honey ham?
Newbie 1: Hey, I need to know how to use the slicer!
Me: Just a second! I'm with a customer!
Customer: Uhh...
Newbie 3: *starts using the scale next to me*
Customer: Yeah, that.
So I grab the ham and go to weigh it, but that newbie is still using the scale.
Newbie 3: What's the code for... whatever this is?
Me: Oven Roasted Turkey breast? 12663
Newbie 3: Oh *punches in 12663 at uber-slow speed*
Me: Sorry for the wait, sir.

And on, and on like that throughout the night. Not to mention I had to go around cleaning up after them.

 

So buddy comes in and buys a PS1 game. No biggie; he leaves happy.

He comes back about an hour later absolutely furious and quite possibly affected by a drug. "THE GAME WON'T SAVE!"

I remember that you need a PS1 memory card for PS1 games.

"Are you playing it on a PS2?"
"Yeah, why ain't this piece of **** saving?"
"You need a PS1 memory card for that."
"WHAT?!"
"You need a PS1 memory card to save PS1 games."
"YOU GUYS ARE ****ING BULLSH**!"
"Excuse me sir?"
"I don't appreciate being ****in' FORCED to buy this ****!"
"Complain to Sony, sir. They made it that way."
"Well I'm not buying a memory card from those ****ing dirtbags!"
"We have third party memory cards that work just fine, and preowned Sony cards that Sony won't see profit from-"
"GIMME A ****IN' THIRD PARTY CARD."
"Sir, please calm down."
"No, I'm ****in' pissed off I have to do this **** for MY ****ing game!"

At this point, his girlfriend was bright red and trying to hide from view. I take out the cheapest third party memory card we have just so he won't freak out about costs. It doesn't work. As he pays he starts up again...

"****in' 12 bucks to play a ****in' 10 dollar game." He carries on ranting like this as I bag his purchase, and hand it to him.

Then he looks at me: "If I see you EB ****s outside the store I'm gettin ****in' payback."

This is the last straw.

"Sir, get out."
"What?"
"Get the **** out."
"You can't tell me to get out! I'm the ****ing customer!"
"Actually I can do whatever you want. My manager is the guy beside me. He seems pretty fine. Now get the **** out, or I will get rid of you myself."

He looks me up and down and realizes it isn't worth it. He grabs his girlfriends arm and drags her out.

"Wait!" I shout.
"What?" He screams.
"Your girlfriend can stay, she's pretty cute."

She starts laughing and he starts running. We never saw him again.

 

Neph... that story owned, and so did you.